Monday, December 9, 2013

Furious With George

Furious With George
I'm in a violent mood at the moment because I am withdrawing from nicotine and yet another tenant in my building is taunting me from the adjoining bathroom. Is he from Nasco like the others? Must I live in poverty with Nascos while I wait for justice? How nice.

Do you recall how George Carlin mentioned his TV commercial and pointed out how it conflicted with the words he said about businessmen in his act? He said, 'I'll let you figure that shit out on your own.' Well, I think I've solved the mystery. George Carlin was a fraud. Almost every word he said about businessmen came from my erased posts from 2006 and 2007. As a fraud he was free to sell out to advertising at the same time as he pretended to be cool and anti-establishment in his act.

Did you get a laugh from seeing George Carlin bashing businessmen on HBO? You know who laughed harder? Businessmen when they laughed at you. They knew you thought my anti-business blogs were funny and they wanted to make money from them, but they had to do it in a way that let them have the last laugh. Every time you laughed at one of my business jokes coming out of Carlin's lying mouth, businessmen were laughing harder at you because they knew you were hurting the author by supporting this fraud. You were slipping right into back their hands at the same time as you thought you were rebelling against them. I imagine the same is true of the businessmen who signed the Crystalids and any other 'rebellious' performer who stole my work. They let you rebel and be 'rad' as long as they could secretly make fools out of you and, above all, destroy me while you were doing it.

I'm glad George Carlin is dead because you people think I'm so funny when I'm yanking my hair out in clumps from anger and frustration. It paid him to injure me so I could throw hilarious fits on the internet and he could steal them! Yes, they sent their minions out to injure me and let me throw a fit over it. Then they made me think I'd offended the population so I would erase my protest and they could claim it for themselves. I've since learned why he and his buddies at SNL thought they were entitled to abuse me this way: because they think I'm their Canadian talent bitch. Given the obsequious behaviour of the guardian of Canadian culture, the CBC, their attitude is understandable. (Does everyone remember what 'obsequious' means from my erased post on Aristotle's table of virtues and vices? It means 'brown nosing'.) That phoney prick would be on a stage right now, telling you about how the cars of the future will run on molten lava and you'd all be just laughing away and thanking him some more for my suffering. But we still have at least one internet jerk who wants to follow in his footsteps. Could someone tell him that he's not fooling anyone by stealing my erased vlogs and pretending they're his? You might save him from going to prison - if he's not already there.

At least Carlin was the only fraud who accurately expressed my opinion in interviews, such as when he said 'power does what it wants' and when he said 'food should not cost money' and when he said 'elections are a charade', all word for word from my erased posts. What a genius.

He was not a poet either. That's why he should have left my 'Modern Man' poem the Hell out of his act. You know, he is precisely the kind of greedy, senseless, destructive monster regularly produced by our brilliant consumer culture. This may be how the citizens of Iraq will all behave now that they've been 'liberated'. Fuck I wish I were never born sometimes.

And who's teaching the course on 'learning improvised comedy'? Did he just get out of prison for fraud? Because it looks like the pros on TV have been improvising all of their best comedy from my erased posts for the last seven years.
  
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